Sir Bumbleswick Damford III tshirt

Meet Sir Bumbleswick Damford III; gentleman, lumber enthusiast, and the only beaver ever banned from three luxury casinos for “suspiciously aggressive pipe smoking.”

Legend says he was born behind a roadside pancake diner during a thunderstorm and raised by retired magicians who taught him two important things: always dress better than your enemies, and never trust a raccoon holding financial documents. By age seven, he’d already won a riverboat poker tournament using nothing but charisma and a bag of stolen walnuts.

Now he roams the wilderness in his signature red plaid coat, solving absolutely no crimes whatsoever while speaking in mysterious one-liners nobody understands. Some say the bubbles from his pipe predict the future. Others say he’s just blowing soap through a modified camping pipe after accidentally inventing “luxury bubble smoking.” Either way, nobody questions him twice. Especially after the Incident at Lake Winnipeg.

This shirt is for people who appreciate chaos, confidence, and the energy of a woodland aristocrat who definitely owes money to someone dangerous.

• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/yd² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Guatemala, Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!